My Collection of Friends

I had a birthday this week.  I am now officially as old as dirt.  Thank goodness for wrinkle creams and camera filters.  In my half-century of life I have collected a wide assortment of things.  Useless knowledge is something I have in adundance.  I still remember phone numbers from my childhood, yet I cannot remember where I left my phone.  I also have enormous amounts of holiday decor.  I could easily decorate a small village for any season.  I am not sure when I will ever be called upon to do that, but I stand ready.  And kitchen utensils?  I could mince, chop, slice, zest, julienne, fold, grate, blend, and grind until the cows come home.  But my favorite collection by far is my collection of dear friends.

I see every new opportunity as a chance to meet new friends.  Luckily, my jobs throughout the years have really made it easy for me to meet some wonderful people.  One of my very first jobs was one I had working for my dad at a advertising publishing company.  We designed and printed grocery store ads.  I worked there the entire time I was in undergraduate school.  I made some wonderful friends at that job, but it took some time. It is not easy to go into a place as the boss’s daughter.  No one really knows how to act around you.  It is quite awkward for a while.  It took some time for my coworkers to see me as me, and not as a mini version of my dad.

We loved to play practical jokes at the publishing company.  Most were pretty silly and common, like hiding things and rearranging furniture.  But then one day, we found a real treasure.  In the dumpster!  Now how and who exactly saw and extracted the treasure is a bit fuzzy.  I do not recall actually being the one who saw the treasure and I absolutely do not remember climbing into the dumpster to get it.  But, I was almost always the ringleader in these escapades, so I might have just selectively erased those memories.  It doesn’t really matter, because the end result was magical.  The end result was Sapphire.  Sapphire was a rather haggard-looking mannequin that had been discarded by the thrift shop next door.  She was missing an arm and she could not stand on her own.  Parts of her body were a little caved in and required some duct tape filler.  In other words, she was the perfect office companion.

Sapphire became a permanent employee.  We got her a wig and appropriate (or inappropriate) seasonal attire.  She spent time in various locations throughout the entire building, including the restroom.  If you happened to leave for vacation, chances were that Sapphire would take over your spot while you were away.  She tended to lurk in dark corners and startled many, many people.  Some coworkers were really put off by Sapphire and wanted nothing to do with her.  Something about her eyes following them wherever they went.  You know me.  I was always very respectful and never popped her right behind them while they were working or anything.  Not me.

Anyway, one Halloween I  started to look for Sapphire’s costume.  I found the perfect one!  It was a Grim Reaper costume that covered her entire body.  My mind started to click away with the possibilities…  We moved Sapphire right next to the time clock where everyone clocked in and clocked out.  She looked like a very festive Halloween decoration.  Everyone saw her at least twice a day, everyday right there in that same spot, leaned up next to the clock.  She was there for weeks.  Until one day when it wasn’t Sapphire in the costume.  One of my coworker friends and I arrived at work very early one day in late October.  She put on Sapphire’s costume and stood in the exact same position next to the time clock.  I hid underneath a table a few feet away, with my video camera turned on.  The first unsuspecting coworker came plodding in and reached for his time card to clock in.  When he pushed it into the clock, my friend in the Grim Reaper costume reached her hand out and said, “Good morning.”  The poor guy jumped backwards, fell down, and let loose of a stream of curse words that was unlike anything I had ever heard.  After laughing hysterically, he went and hid around the corner so that we could prank the next coworker.  She had pretty much the same reaction.  Every single person’s reaction was absolutely hilarious.  I video taped the entire show.  I even sent it to America’s Funniest Home Videos.  Unfortunately, it contained too much profanity for network televsion.  That’s exactly what the letter they sent back to me said.  It was true.  If they had bleeped out the naughty words, there would have been nothing left.

That was just one of our many fun times.  Sadly, two of the good friends I made during that job have passed away fairly recently.  I am sad that they are gone, but so thankful for the wonderful memories that I have.  We worked together in the early to mid 1990s.  So much time has passed, but I will always consider them my good friends.

I moved on from that job to my career in teaching.  I have worked with and become friends with so many wonderful teachers over the years.  I don’t know about you, but I feel like I spend a lot of my time at work.  I’m not saying that in a bad way, because I love my profession.  But we work a lot!  When I was in my last district, I was there for over twenty years.  In that time I had gotten married and had two children who had grown quite a bit.  The friends I made at school were with me through all of that, and I was with them when they married and started families.  I can remember hilarious stories that happened and I can remember tough times when we all had to pull together to help each other through.  Now I have another career in education and I am building more friendships.

I am so grateful to be surrounded by all of these amazing people who I am lucky enough to call friends.  And whether I met them this year or forty-five years ago, I appreciate each and every one.  I value the connection we have and the memories we have made.  I hope we will make lots more.  But no more dumpster diving, please.  I’d throw my back out.