Well, May has arrived. There was no stopping it. I tried really hard. I pushed off all thoughts of May and stayed very content in March and April for as long as was humanly possible. May snuck in anyway. And with it will come Emily’s high school graduation and her 18th birthday. She is simply delighted. Emily was over high school before it began. She’s ready for college and life beyond that. I have no worries that she is not prepared to tackle the world. I just long for a little more time with the tiny blond tot who was very much a mommy’s girl.
I called her my pretty little princess, and she says I dressed her like an American Girl doll. She wore “matching sets” as Emily calls them and I had bows made to match every one. She was very shy with most people, but she was anything but that at home. She sang and danced and bossed all day long. The only thing she ever really got in trouble for was her bossiness. I can vividly remember putting her in time out for thinking she was the boss of me. All she had to do was say she was not the boss and she could come out of her room. She would be in there for a very LONG time.
I always wanted my pretty little princess to have a fairy tale life with only happiness sprinkled with glitter and sunshine. She has had a lot of that, but she has had some down times, too. If I could have taken Emily’s hardships and endured them myself, I would have done so in an instant. Her pain changed me profoundly, as it did her. I would say that the trials brought us closer together, but that isn’t really true. We have always been deeply connected. They did prove to me that Emily might be the strongest person I know. What I thought was bossiness was really sheer determination.
So Emily will participate in all of the traditional graduation festivities, and I will cry like my leg has been hacked off. Literally. (I was a total embarrassment at Matthew’s graduation. Strangers tried to comfort me. Tyra refuses to sit anywhere near me this time around.) I will cry not out of sadness, but out of pride. Emily is amazing. She has done amazing things. She has overcome amazing things. She will do amazing things.
Congratulations to my pretty little princess, Emily. You amaze me.